Two weeks ago, while I was getting ready in my bathroom:
Q – “Mommy, me black!” (Like a proclamation)
Me – “Actually, I think you are a beautiful brown.”
Q – Looks at his arm with furrowed brow: “Hmmm…browwwwwn. Sissy brown too?”
Me – “Yes, she is brown too! Isn’t her skin pretty?” Pointing to Keira.
Q – Casually he answers: “Yeah”. Then staring at me for a long time: “Mommy white?”
Me – Sighing: “Yes, sadly, Mommy is a pasty white and not much looks good on me as a result. You and sissy have the most beautiful color of skin and everything looks good on you.”
Q – With a very concerned look: “Mommy? Why me black? Why?”
Me – “Because God made you and me and sissy-girl in His image. So we are all exactly as He wanted us to look.”
(blank stare at me)….”Well, He also must have known how good you’d look in Orange!”
Last week, Quint and I were discussing where we’re from:
Q - “Mommy? Where from?”
Me - “I’m from California. Not terribly interesting, I know. But still…it’s home.”
Q – “Why you do dat?”
Me – “What? Come from California?”
Q – “yeah”
Me – “errrmmm, well I didn’t have a choice. That’s where Nina and Papa lived when I was born. So when Nina had me, we lived in California and so I just lived there for a really long time.”
Q – pensive look and furrowed brow. “Me from Arifcak?”
Me – “yes, you are from Africa”
Q – “Mommy live Africak?”
Me – ……blank look….”no, baby…Mommy didn’t live there when you were born”
Q – “oh…Mommy not from Africak?”
Me – “no, Mommy not from Africak. But I went to Africa with Daddy when you were a baby, so that we could be together. Isn’t that wonderful?!”
Q – “mm hmm”…(looking confused and not really absorbing that information.) “Me play wif my cars?”
Me – “yes, let’s play with your cars…”
He’s a charming, bright, and curious little guy!
But I do believe it’s finally starting…and so, can I ask that you pray for us as we navigate Quint’s beautiful story and humble beginnings with him over the next several years. I know it seems rather straight forward. But when you’re living it – it certainly seems more daunting – this role of protecting the heart, speaking the truth, and comforting the soul. I know my children are loved – but that doesn’t change the story’s beginning. It doesn’t change that they are “short” two parents and an entire extended biological family. As we move into the phase of understanding over the next few years, I am hopeful that God’s grace will permeate the air of our family, and allow us to use the right words in loving kindness. We would covet your prayers as we learn how to love our kids more and more and meet them exactly where they are.
