December 29, 2006


Nineteen months since we started this litttle monkey chase...

Nine months since we gave our hard earned paperwork to UPS

Nine months since we put our hopes in the hands of the CCAA

Nine months of decorating a nursery, collecting scores of baby clothes, books, hair bows, and dolls.

Nine months of waiting and waiting and waiting.

Seven, eight, nine, ten more to go... (????)

Mommy and Daddy are coming Keira! Hang in there sweet girl ~

December 26, 2006

Out with the with the...errr..Valentines??

Merry Christmas, yeah yeah. NEXT! Oops, I skipped right over my New Year decor...oh well...I'm anxious to get on with two things:

2007 and the adoption of my daughter

and ~

Valentines Day and a sappy excuse to be overtly romantic on this blog (like my new look?) and to express my love and affection for my husband, who is truly the love of my life and a wonderful, amazing man. I am taking advantage of the decor and really dedicating this setup to him. The new slideshow, the music, the little hearts...just a little way of paying homage to our love - which I hold very dear after seven wonderful, difficult, amazing, growth producing, beautiful years together. I love you, babe! Thick ~ thin ~ difficult ~ easy ~ I'm here for the long haul.

Anyhow, out with the old and in with the new. I'm over Christmas and it's not even been done for two hours. I can't help it. It was fun, we had a full house, fun presents, great food, all that! STILL, I'm ready to move on. SOOOOO...

Let's get on with it, shall we?

Valentines it is...


December 23, 2006

I'm still here...

It's been short December for us. There has been so little time to get much done, that blogging has been low priority. Work has been very busy, Christmas shopping has been frantic at best, and we're very involved in our church's Christmas Eve services (all four of them) so we have a very busy day tomorrow. We also have a full house for Christmas Day - which, I'm actually grateful for in retrospect of how lonely our last Christmas was. We sat home, AB was sick, and I spent the day on the couch watching "A Christmas Story" over and over with a large bowl of Ramen. Now we can entertain and will be distracted that our darling girl is not here to be spoiled rotten by us. So, as for the company ~ we have my in-laws and also my cousins from California and their newborn adopted son. We also have our local dear friends and their little daughter. It'll be a full house!

Yesterday I had lunch with my M3 Crew, and it was a blast, of course. For clarification, look on the side bar to the right at the "Adoption Posse" slideshow. These are my "GIRLS"!!!! I love them so much and they have added such joy and support to my life. These are not words...what started as a "let's just get together some time", has turned into five of my very dearest friends. They have helped me to get through this past year with laughter, tears, and complete and utter acceptance. We are all adopting from China and have one veteran who has adopted twice from China. It's an amazing blend of women and I'm so grateful for them. So the point is, when I am low - they literally send out SOS's for me. They notice me. They remember and know me. They care for me as I do for them... So yesterday, we met for lunch and we had the loveliest time and I was sad to have to leave them.

Meanwhile, I just want everyone to know that when I post on here - and it seems totally negative - it's just reflective of how I'm feeling in that moment. It's not my end all emotion. It's just the way I feel when I have waited so long for my daughter to be home and she still is not because of ridiculous political hangups. Bureaucracy. I'm really looking forward to getting through the holidays and getting on with 2007, because I would like to retain the hope that I will be holding Keira by the end of it. I would like to think that all my waiting is not in vain and that at some point, our dossier will actually find it's way to her file and ultimately lead us to her. That's my New Year Resolution ~ to have my child home and in her bed and sleeping with the peace of having her forever family.

On to the present: I am really glad you all keep checking in here - I've got a new computer and it's taking me a little time to get all my favorites and pictures, etc. on here. Don't give up on me - I'm going to be posting more after Christmas, and I'm going to be working on a blog makeover in January for Winter.

I want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year - and to all the waiting families, like us, a SPEEDY referral process, Lord willing.


December 12, 2006

No time to say "Hello, Goodbye"

Sorry all - I've been out of the loop. I'm a bit of a disaster. Not only emotionally (thank you suck A** referral month) but also physically. If I'm being honest (and I am as far as you know) I've had two horrible periods in the past three weeks. Yes, in the past three weeks. Last time I checked these were supposed to be spaced apart by 28 days, give or take a few. Is something wrong, I wonder? Second, I just recovered from a nasty upper-respiratory infection. Which was bad, in and of itself. My doctor was kind enough to prescribe for a me a really efficient anti-biotic, but failed to mention that it would cause this within hours of taking it. Needless to say, this is now my best friend. Too much info? Is that what I hear? Well tough. Imagine how I feel?!? Read someone else blog for Christmas cheer. Mine is gloom, doom, and despair. Who would have thought that antibiotics could give you so much grief! I feel great from the chest up - but hit the nether-regions and we're in trouble. And when I did the research about Ketek (said antibiotic), I realized I'm not alone. Other women have experienced this side affect as well. Well, HMPH, and double HMPH. Doesn't this picture say it? I'm just so, I don't know...tired.

Another gripe is that I'm not done Christmas shopping by a long shot, haven't mailed gifts to my secret pal or family, and haven't even begun to think about Christmas cards. To make matters more interesting, I'm buried in my work that pays for these gifts. No time. I also have company coming this week and I'm not ready. Not ready, I tell you! My cousins are coming to adopt - their birth mom is giving birth not far from where we live - they asked to stay here while they receive the baby and finalize the paperwork - could be up to two weeks - all in all fine with me and hubby (we are big fans of adoption after all), but with everything else - ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Oh, and we got a really dreadful e-mail from our agency this week about policy changes with the CCAA, etc. Not going into detail - just saying that as patient as we've tried to be - the hits just keep on coming. Won't affect us this round - but if we go through China again for a second adoption, let's just say we (the Beaver Cleaver family) would be in trouble. That's how scary the guildelines are getting. What was it I said at the beginning? Oh yeah, sucks A**!

And a bah humbug to us all.

Other than that -

AB and his good buddy Charlie got to go see the Cowboys get spanked the other night at Cowboy stadium, but he had fun. Here's a couple pics...

Also, got to spend time with my favorite baby today (also known as "the other Keira" - because that's her name too) and she is just too cute. She laughs all the time, love-love-loves to read books,(or rather have me read to her) and loves to look at things and say "ohhhh" and "yeah" and "ahhhhkay". She's so cute, but she wears this girl out! SCARY! Also, it must be nice to visit somewhere for the day where there is a nursery fit for a princess waiting for you and even has "your" name on wall in big white letters? Not to mention the vast supply of toys, clothing, books, and blankets just waiting to be used by chubby, grubby baby hands. Must be nice. I always tell her that she's Keira's "big sister" or sorts, and that she must try out everything to make sure it's fun and kid-friendly. She happily obliges. But as I say, cant be too hard when your name is on the wall. She must think this is her personal retreat while away from home! At least someone is using the stuff - it helps a little that I get to practice saying Keira's name and playing with Keira's stuff and having someone so adorable, named Keira, respond!

Sorry I'm so cranky otherwise. I have a lot to be thankful for in my life. But right now, I would love to count Keira Joy among them. Right now she is just so far away. It's getting hard. We're getting older. And CCAA will not cooperate. Wait is at 16 months according to our agency. That's July for all you March LID-ers. July before we get matched. Oh, and then there's the nice little tag they love throwing on the end - "and we expect the wait to get longer". God I wish just once they would say "and we anticipate a shorter wait very soon". Would it kill them? Now, I ask you!

Sorry, totally in a crappy Christmas mood and can't seem to snap out of it...

December 5, 2006

I'm still bitter - so I morphed a song

Our hope got run over by referrals

China slowed way down for Christmas eve.

You can say there's no such thing as bad luck,

But as for me and AB, we believe.

I’ve been drinkin' too much egg nog,

The nursery’s turned into a joke.

When folks come over to admire it,

They pay fare and have to pass through a red rope...

Now another Christmas mornin',

will come and go without our dear.

it’s no surprise to all who’re waiting,

that it looks like we’ll all wait another year

Our hope got run over by referrals

China slowed way down for Christmas eve.

You can say there's no such thing as bad luck,

But as for me and AB, we believe.

Now were all so sad and lonely,

And it’s so hard to explain

Why we’re always still a year off

from getting her from China – we complain

It's not Christmas without Keira.

All the family's dressed in black.

And we just can't help but wonder:

Should we open up her gifts or send them back?

Our hope got run over by referrals

China slowed way down for Christmas eve.

You can say there's no such thing as bad luck,

But as for me and AB, we believe.

Now the crib is still so empty

And the toys are growing dust

And her closets full of clothing

And a tricycle that’s growing old with rust

I've warned all my friends and neighbors.

Better watch out for yourselves."

There shouldn’t be so many families

With their paperwork just sitting on the shelves

Our hope got run over by referrals

China slowed way down for Christmas eve.

You can say there's no such thing as bad luck,

But as for me and AB, we believe.

December 3, 2006

Burn, baby burn...

I've thought about it and man oh man...

I'm still mad...

About Referrals that is...

Don't get me wrong my faithful peeps, I am happy for those that got theirs - but I am piping mad about the pitiful few, and about the masses left out in the cold once again.

This is really starting to get to me and I'm not alone. I actually realized yesterday as I was decorating the house for Christmas that it really may not be our "last one" without Keira. Which made me mad. Again. Really mad.

Come this time next year, we will have been in this process almost three years. That's far too long to ask anyone to wait. Simply put - it's plain old not fair to the families, or the waiting children.

Who's in charge of this quackered operation anyway?!? Probably the same guy who invented pantyhose, size zero jeans, Easy Cheese, and The Dress Barn. Jerk.

November 30, 2006

Baby, it's cold outside...

First of all - my "little" dog Kaleigh hates thunder. She shakes uncontrollably and cannot be comforted. She has taken to hiding in the bathtub for hours on end - alone and scared. I can't stand it. I would crawl in that bathtub with her, if I didn't think it would freak her out more. SO - I usually just find a warm blanket and put it in there with her. Case in point: last night. A cold front was moving in and a storm was brewing. Sure enough, the temperature dropped substantially and the thunder, lightening, and rain moved in. Needless to say, I found Kaleigh in her spot - shaking like a leaf. Isn't this just so pathetic?!? Gosh I love that pooch!

Meanwhile, I was very right about the cold front. Yesterday afternoon it was 75 degrees.
This morning I looked out my window and saw this:

and this:

which quickly precipitated this for the rest of the day and evening:

Now I know that this is not Midwest snow-storm crazy weather.
But in a place that was 75 degrees yesterday and quite comfortable, it's worth
mentioning that within twelve hours, we went to this.
Let's face it, it's got to get fairly cold for my car to be covered in ice and snowflakes, right?

Later AB came home and was kind enough to make a wonderful meal (per as usual!), which we enjoyed by the aforementioned fireplace. We had such a relaxing and cozy night, it was worth writing about. Hope wherever you are - it's warm and cozy and you're with someone you love!

The constant companions...err...beggars....standby while Dad prepares dinner.



That's all that I or Mr. Frog have to say about this months referrals...

Every month it just seems to get bleaker and bleaker. Talk about being at the mercy of a clearly "broken" time clock. You know, I realize we're a tough group - but most people can only take so much bad news when it concerns something so important.

For those that don't follow - China has only matched families with a Log In Date up to September 8th, 2005. We were expecting them to match all the way to the end of September, which just puts this wait off even more. For every delay, we all wait longer and longer. Imagine my dear friend Dena's dismay when she realized she had missed the cut off by ONE day...

The least they could have done was give us something to celebrate this month! It's Christmas after all, Uncle Scrooge!

Meanwhile, I would be remiss not to mention those precious few who have come before us and finally are getting their referrals - so to you Congratulations and I truly am happy for you and so glad your journey is finally nearing it's end.

For the rest of us sitting around watching the ground crack for months on end, I 'll just say...


November 28, 2006

November 24, 2006

November 22, 2006

In Loving Memory II

First, let me just say thank you to all of you who have e-mailed or posted a comment about my grandfather passing away on Sunday night. It is so special to me to have such a sweet community of support, and I appreciate all of you very much.

Second, I sadly must report that we have suffered another loss in my family - my Great-Grandfather Walter passed away Monday morning. He was 101 years old and a true patriarch of our family. His health was slowly deteriorating and we knew he could not stay with us much longer, but what a blessing to have had him in our lives for so long. I was one of the few people I knew of at my age with a great-grandparent still living, and I have not taken that for granted. His funeral will be Monday, the same day as my Grandpa Charlie, so I will not be able to attend, but please keep my family in your thoughts and prayers. It's been a difficult week for us and we are just giving thanks tomorrow that we had these two special men in our lives for as long as we did. It's just difficult to bury two Grandfathers on the same day...
In Loving Memory of
Walter Nonamaker
September 19, 1905 - November 20, 2006

November 21, 2006

Back in the Saddle

I was looking over the posts for the whole month of November, and there are only five. That's pretty lousy! I have been meaning to post updates for the last two weeks, but I was trying to catch up from being gone to CA for ten days, and then Grandpa passed away Sunday night and it's been a little hectic with Thanksgiving coming up. So, I've decided to break down the info into sections:

1. Birthday ~ I turned...Old...
Here is a picture from my Birthday dinner at Benihana. Me and the hubby and four of our very dear friends dined on some great Japanese style food and enjoyed a Japanese serenade afterward. For my big day, AB got me a toy. Literally... It's a Nintendo DS Lite, which is all the rage if you're under 15, but we're gamers and so it's the rage for us too. That and the Nintendo Wii, which we can't seem to get our hands on because they were sold out the day they came out! Hmph! Well, here's a picture of my new little beauty...and the color! Can you stand it? (You probably can) The cool thing is , it's so little and compact that it fits in my purse and I can play it in the car, on a plane (hello, 15 hours to China!) or just about anywhere. It has a car charger, ear phones, and you can see it's in a nifty little PINK carrying case that fits in my hand. Too cute! Outside of that, I got some amazing Northern Nights flannel sheets from my Mom, and they are so thick and warm and cozy! The big surprise came from my friend and co-worker, Laura - who got me a Digital Canon ELPH camera. She knew I had been going without a camera for a couple months since mine bought the farm, and so she got me this amazing camera. I LOVE IT. All the pictures in this post as a result are courtesy of her wonderful gift!

In addition to all these wonderful things, my secret pal did NOT disappoint - in fact she got me all weepy with the most amazing surprise - and the fact that these are my favorite colors, pink and green, and Keira's nursery colors, and not to mention the little ladybug and most of all the personalization - I just can't tell you how much I love these little braclets. They are precious! Thank you, thank you, thank you! She also sent a wonderful card and small Chinese jewelry box, and a set of note cards. (pictured above)
2. Baby does a Mud Run...and I do the muddy laundry:
Anton made a commitment several months ago to do a mud run for Toys for Tots - so, there's not much to tell, except he did it and here are the great pics from the event... that's my baby...never back down from a great challenge! I'm so proud of him! That's his idea of a good holiday event.
Go Honey!

3. My dear friend Desiree had her baby
Finally - poor thing! She was miserable and ready to be done with being pregnant - and this pregnancy was a little harder on her than her last, so she was just baked. But, her son is just beautiful and has the most beautiful olive skin and blue eyes. He was a whopping 9 pounds and some change...I don't know how my skinny little friend got him out so easy, but two pushes and there he was! Congrats to her family for such a precious little addition...

4. Keira's room gets a mini-makeover
We finally got around to hanging stuff on the walls in Keira's room. This and more will all be added to the Keira's Nursery blog page, but I wanted to update here as well. Actually, I've changed the look of her Nursery blog, and I'll be adding even more pictures of clothes, etc. in the next couple days. The letters were plain white, but I painted pink and green polka dots on them for "flavor" (hehe) and the other picture shows her new little shelves. Those initials are courtesy Pottery Barn Kids - but don't rush out to get them - they were just discontinued! Darn it~ This is also only two of the four walls, and we hung something on each wall - but picture overkill is not far off on this in the interest of keeping you interested...

5. Our Thanksgiving plans got squashed.
Badly. We had plans to go with two other couples to New Mexico and this was planned for months. But just last week, we heard from one couple that the house we thought we had rented for the week was also rented to another family for the same week and we lost the toss up because that family had already taken up residence. So we're doing a big fat nothing this Thursday. Well, except that AB got all the stuff to make a great dinner, and we're the only two eating it...anyone home alone this Thursday wanna come over? Otherwise, we'll just eat and lounge around. Not that there's anything wrong with that! (Geesh, sounds pretty good to me right now)

6. Break out the black suit.
I'll be leaving for Atlanta on Saturday to attend my Grandfather's funeral. Not looking forward to that trip at all. Be praying for me, friends.

7. Keira's Wardrobe Continues Expanding...
I just recently learned from some friends with the experience to tell it, that I had some great clothes, but mostly in sizes way too big fo
r our darling. I was always asking for12 months and up, and they gently reminded me how typically tiny these little munchkins are when they're adopted. So, we downsized a little. (God no, not the actual closet, just the clothing size!) I've started getting a few things in 6-9 months just in case. Here's a couple pictures for those interested, in the latest additions to the nursery. The first is a potential Halloween Costume for next who could resist that little flower? Next is the rocking chair her Grandfather, Anton Sr. found at a garage sale and lovingly restored and painted to match her nursery furniture. It is so beautiful. Then we have the next three which are pictures of the latest gifts we've received for her and a couple things I got for her as well. Thanks to Grandma Nila for the darling outfits, and the shoes! Not to mention all the little things you got her like the sunglasses and sippy cups. You're the best!

Would that it were a baby picture I was showing you here as the latest "addition" to the nursery...but alas, still just more clothes and play-p
urties. As always, you can click on the picture to view a larger version to see detail.

There's nothing much else to tell you all - except that I hope you have a great Thanksgiving, and for all the waiting families - enjoy it to fullest - and pray that our babies will be home soon! Oh, and also, we tried Ritzy's for all you North D. families - it was fun and good food...give it a go!
Happy Turkey Day!

November 20, 2006

In Loving Memory

Tonight I got the late night call we all dread getting. At 11:30 pm, my dear sweet grandfather went home to be with the Lord. It was unexpected and we are still in shock that a man who was such a vibrant light in our family has left us. A man who I didn't appreciate until my adult years (as it always goes) and someone who made me laugh until my sides hurt, and charmed us all with his quick wit, winning smile, and gentle spirit. The man who so often wore a golfers cap and suspenders, walked with a slight limp, and told me as often as he saw me "you sure are pretty, baby".

The last time I saw my Grandpa, he and I hugged to say goodbye and I noticed he was upset and crying. When I asked him why he was crying he replied, "I just love you so much and I hate to see you go"...

Me too too...

Charles Edward Noble
February 11, 1923 - November 19, 2006

November 16, 2006

Ahem...and now announcing...

A new look for the Christmas Season! Don't worry blogger pals, it's only for the holidays...

What can I tell you? I love Christmas - and I know that we haven't even had Turkey for Thanksgiving yet - but our plans to leave town got squashed and so, I'm celebrating the season early by giving my little blog a makeover. Just for a while...

I'll post more about the latest and greatest tomorrow, but meanwhile, let the baking commence!

November 10, 2006

Review, Life, and blah, blah, blah

Well, I figured that after almost a week of Charlie Brown music, lovely though it may be, you might want a little something more to feed on. So here's the latest, in no particular order...

1. We're now officially in Review. Well, we aren't, but our dossier is. But really, we are. We're now under the miscroscope that is Chinese Review. I feel like it will be fine - my head says it will be fine - but the paranoid freak in me says "wait for it...wait for comes the call that says 'I'm sorry CB and AB - but it turns out you're total weirdos and have issues beyond normal and so that's a big fat thumbs down for you two'. Kill me now. We have to sit in review for two months. That's a long time to be biting my nails and pacing the floor, waiting for said call. Boooo! That's what I say...boooo!

2. I'm bored. I'm bored with everything right now. I mean, I'm super busy and the weeks just fly by. But on the other hand, I'm with's just blah lately. Just blah...nothing to say and nothing new to tell.

3. AB had his production of "The Phantom Tollbooth" last weekend and it was great, just like all the others. I brought a little friend with me (thank you Robyn for coming to the play with me and for the great picture you took, that I lovingly swiped) The kids did such a great job, and I can tell how hard they all worked to nail that show, and nail it they did. As a little surprise, the kids got me flowers to say thank you for having to "part" with my beloved for the two months of production and practice that took place every day of the week. It was very sweet and thoughtful, and they were just gorgeous. AB - I love you and it was FANTASTIC! Another great sucess, as if it could have been anything less.

4. Another Robyn moment: Thank you girl! Robyn and her hubby came and picked me up at the airport (an hour and a half drive one-way for them!!!) because I was rideless. You're the best! Of course, being the COMEDIAN that she is, she had a big hot pink sign with my last name on it and was walking around the terminal with it in her hands. Or course, she had to get a picture, and of course, I had to steal it.

5. We have a lot of stuff coming up: in addition to work of course, we have a trip planned to New Mexico for Thanksgiving week, with two other couples. We're all boycotting family affairs. You know, we all want the Norman Rockwell Holidays, but it never turns out that way. It's always the same: too much to eat, tired cranky people who are too full to enjoy each others company, the crazy bickering relatives, the complaining hypochondriac of the family, and the relative who talks your ear off about NOTHING well into the evening. Well, we decided if we were boycotting, this was the year to do it. So we're off to celebrate our own way, with some good friends and some good food, and a beautiful vacation home (free of charge, I might add). I'm hoping we have a great time. I'm also hoping that it's the last one without you know who...(sigh...I think I just jinxed myself) Outside of that trip, we have multiple commitments at church over the next two months - me with singing, and AB with drama and service production. We also are the leaders of our church's adoption ministry and have a big dinner this weekend for that. I've also got several "dates" with my Mommies Who Lunch crew - including this Sat. night when we will be stuffing ourselves with chocolate and playing games, etc. into the wee hours.

6. I feel sick. I think I'm coming down with something and this is not a good time for me to be down and out. I have a very busy weekend ahead. Not good. This kind of irritates me...because it feels like the kind where you're sick to your stomach, headache, all that crap. See! Blah! Ok - sorry this is a lame post. But it's the latest and greatest anyhow...

Oh, and another thing...Kelley had a link on her website to the most wonderful blog...and so I have to share also, because it is now one of my favorites too...check it out -

Last but not least...I've been shopping. Have you been to If you've never checked this place out - it's fun. I admit, it's a little pricey on some stuff - however, I have never bought anything from them that was full price because if you click their Outlet link, then you can look at all the stuff on clearance in one place and so much of it is so cute! I got the most darling outfit for $14.99. It was even cuter once I had it in my hands, than when I first saw it online. And I'm sorry, but how cute is this outfit?

Ok - enough from me for now...
The blah girl is signing off...


signing off now...

blah, blah, blah...

November 6, 2006

Christmas Time is Here

Well, it's true, like it or not. AB and I went shopping yesterday to kill some time, and ended up at the mall. Every little store we went in had Christmas decor and people seemed to already be in the spirit of things. Red, Green, and Gold was everywhere and I was feeling myself get excited as I started mentally going down my Christmas Shopping List. But later as we snacked on some food court goodies, AB brought it all back home with these simple words:

"I thought she would be home this Christmas...", he said quietly.

Me too...

We sat there for a minute in silence listening to the bustling crowd and the Carousel chiming in the background, and the Christmas music overhead.

And there it was...the pang of her absence that we skillfully keep at bay most of the time. The little whip of stinging that we feel when we stop moving for a moment and remember that we were supposed to be parents by now.

Then we remember that we are parents. Her parents...even if she's not here right now, she's still out there and we're still her parents. Missing her is just a part of living, for right now. I pleaded with AB to tell me that this would be the last Christmas without her, and of course, he only half smiled and gave me a light squeeze.

Christmas time is here. And once again, she is not.

We are missing our girl...

October 31, 2006

"Splash" Mountain My Rear...

Just want to say for the record that just getting splashed would have been a treat - instead we got drenched and I think we may have had a little too much weight in the boat,
if you follow me...

Regardless, tons of fun...of course...

For Robyn...

A little piece of Disneyland for all my Disney Buddies...(especially Robyn!)
This is my whole entourage.
"Ready for lift-off in five, four, three, two, one.......blast off!"
(Oh, and Happy Pumpkin Day everyone!)