What I want to say is this...
Only five months have passed, as of today. Only five short, incredibly fast months since she was placed in our arms.
We had what you could call, a very difficult transition period when we met Keira in January.
Many of you who followed along read what a very sad, traumatic, trying, and difficult transition we experienced.
And it was heartbreaking on so many levels - the disappointment and rejection AB and I felt seemed insurmountable in moments
and there are many, many people reading this blog who are still waiting parents
some of them even getting ready to travel
and all the excitement and fears and wonder and anxiousness can be extremely overwhelming
so maybe when you read a blog like mine, and you read a story like Keira's - it makes you sad or makes you feel vulnerable, maybe scared...hoping it's not like that for you. And I can so understand that. I've been right where you are. And for us, it ended up being exactly what we had feared, in so many ways. And I pray for you it's not.
However, not too many people - not nearly enough people - will tell you like it is, the way I told it like it was. Especially from this type of format - where many of us are strangers and I have nothing to gain by exposing my heartache.
except now I want you to know something...need you to know something
No matter what darkness we walked through five months ago - we knew one thing remained...Hope.
There was always hope deep down in our spirits
There is always a way when your will is strong
There is always direction, if you're looking to find it
Wisdom. Strength. Perseverance.
And love, love, and more love.
Not easy. But always there.
I leaned heavily on the love and comfort of my Heavenly Father. I cannot tell you how much that one thing alone carried me through such a difficult and trying season of my motherhood experience.
and so, I'm here...telling it like it is, and this time, I think you'll like it.
That no matter what happens when you're united with your little one - you all know who you are - those traveling, waiting for referrals, or contemplating adoption
no matter what happens in those first moments, those first weeks, months...maybe even longer for some - still...
there is hope
there is always hope
lean on it...lean into it...be comforted in it...
focus your eyes on it
grab hold of it
dwell on it in the dark moments and bask in it when it covers you
This is how we made it to where we are now
Hope. Believing in tomorrow. Hoping...
Perhaps it's better to show you...
and so with hope in our hearts
and love, love, and more love...
five months later...
there is Hope
and love, love, and more love