June 4, 2010

Reality

you know?  It can be a bit like cold water in your face. 

And reality is a lot to swallow some days. And I'm not speaking for you.  Oh no.  I would never.  I'm speaking for me.  Yes, just for me.  And for mine.  I'm sure there is no one out there who can relate at all.  Nope.  No one at all.

And you wanna know something?  I am that Mom who sits looking out the window, hint of drool in the corner of her mouth, saying "just three more years...three more...then I can have quasi-intelligent conversations with them.  Perhaps even reason with them.  Mayhap...get through a day without a nap".  Me, not them.

And I am also that same mom who wrote many a blog posts lamenting being lonely for these kidlets of mine and longing desperately for that which I now whine about on occasion.  Also, for the record, let's just state here and now that I am hook, line, and sinker in love with these two children of mine.  But help a sista out.  It's hard work.  Can I get an amen?


I'm also a girl who loves order.  With a penchant for a little bit of the OCD.  Yes, that's my reality.  And BC (before children) I thought that order would always rule my life.  That I would snap my little fingers like Mary Poppins and a spoon full of sugar would keep the dust bunnies away.  That even when we were AC (after chaos children) somehow things would just continue as they always had. (oh slap me) We had a motto BC...and it was that everything had a place and everything was in its place.  

I don't know about you, because...well, we're only talking about me, remember?  But in my AC house...things are often just plan ol' messy.  Like a lot.  Like a really lot.  Snort.
I don't think we get through a single day without the living room resembling a toy dumping ground.  Sacred though it may be for all those under 3.  For me it's a tripping hazard.  And I won't even tell you the words that come flying out of my mouth when I step on some jaggedy shaped piece of something that belongs to some whateverthesamhill.  


Some days my dishes sit.  And sit.  And pile up.  And sit some more.  And let's be honest (as per usual) - I hate doing dishes.  Loading?  Unloading?  Rinsing?  Doesn't matter.  Hate it.  Not fun. And sometimes they just, well...sit there.  Until I can get up the gumption to stop adding to the pile and start cleaning it up.  Reality.

I swear to you, laundry literally pro-creates when I leave it alone for like .5 seconds.  No, listen...this is serious friends.  The laundry at my house...like back in...I don't know 2008 I think...it like quadrupled.  And I was all "what the heck" and AB was all "I know, right?".  And now?  Don't get me started. Like around January of this year...it freaking jumped the shark, my laundry.  It's not even realistic anymore.  It's just piles and piles begetting more piles...worse than Genesis.  T-shirts begetting dress shirts.  Dress shirts begetting pants.  Pants begetting onesies.  Oh, the reality. 


Sometimes I'll be cleaning.  Yes, sometimes.  In all my spare time.  Double snort.  And let's say I'll be in the bathroom, and straightening up a pile of clothes on the floor or emptying the trash.  And I look around and see the mess that just  IS.  It just seems like as I'm cleaning up one mess, the other messes are staring me down and calling me out from the corners of every room.  And the bathtub.  Don't even get me started on "The Tub"...mess.

Oh wait, look...it's here.  Awesome.


The hap-hazard makeup basket for the "carefree easy-going lovely mom look" that I sport at least once a year?  I'll be honest...what the hay.  Reality?  I don't wear makeup that often.  Ok, almost never.  I can't help it.  I have frequently  been known to sport a baseball cap, sweats, AND a sad and sorry lack of makeup.  GASP!  I know!  But is there any reason for my poor makeup basket to sit in disarray day in and out? 

Priorities people.  Sometimes it's just about getting into the car in one piece with two kids in tow and making it somewhere on time.  The things you let go...

Reality.

And while we're airing out my dirty laundry...no really, I'm airing it out as we speak - I have been known to engage in child labor.  Listen, start em' young.  That's what I always say. Whatever works.



And see what I mean?  Messes behind messes behind messes while the child pretends to vacuum.  I mean, the messes are just pro-creating all over the freaking house.  (And don't tell me you missed the "naughty chair" back there...facing the door.  Oh yes.  I mean, that's just us, right?  I'm sure you never need one of those at your house...

And I will admit to you that I have stacks of stuff.  And BC? I swore up an down that I would never have "stacks".  Piles of papers, ads, magazine, books, clothes, supplies, random whoseyourmama stuff that just sits and sits and sits.  And now they're breeding.  Taking a lesson from the laundry, I guess?  But it's everything I can do to keep these stacks from growing to the ceiling.  

And it's so not me.  Won't you please believe me?  That is to say, it's not how I thought I would be.  Not how I thought things would get done or not get done AC.  I was so sure my OCD tendencies would carry me through the years and avoid the cleaning "challenged" pitfalls of new motherhood. 


Still, it's my reality.  At least for a while.  Like, umm..17, 18 more years or so.  Sniff.  I mean, that's like...not that long.  And I'm trying to make peace with it.  Of course, I'm only speaking for myself.  I'm sure this is just me...positively sure.

And with that, I have not a scrap of dignity left with which to flaunt in your direction.


Oh - except I'll say this: I love my babies.  (Do I have to qualify that each time I write honest posts about real life - God forbid we ever confess to not being totally infatuated with all aspects of motherhood - i.e. a messy house)

Just keepin' it real

Holla'

22 comments :

Kelley said...

OK...when you said your laundry "jumped the shark" you had me laughing out loud. Hilarious! Oh, girl...we'd be friends. I am the same way. I love order, love organization, am slightly OCD. I have one 4 year old...soon to travel to get baby #2 (she'll be 18 months old). We have toys upon toys upon toys...and our laundry is breeding too. And the dishes? I hate them as much as you do. I promise.

You are not alone.

But, one sad sad day in the not-too-far-off future, we'll be sitting around in perfectly clean houses...babies all grown up and flown from the nest...and we'll wish we were back in the days of the haphazard toys all over the house, the prolific laundry, and yes...even those dirty dishes piled up in the sink. So I try to smile and enjoy it. When people come over, I never apologize for the mess. I'm thrilled to have the opportunity to be living in such wonderful chaos.

I know that you are too.

Thanks for the laughs this morning!

Ani said...

Amen!
Wait until Le.gos enter your life... I have sustained some life threatening injuries by stepping on those little itty bitty blocks.

Renate said...

Girl, I don't have kids, I do have a very demanding full time job and a messy house. My laundry is doing the same thing yours is!! Piles , don't even know where it came from. My sister said the other day, " you have a lot of laundry to do don't you" Well yes. I really try. What makes it so bad is,its only me.One day I will have it under control, please say its true. Hang in there.
Feel your pain.

Kim said...

Thanks for the laughs this morning! The laundry - I have even said my one wish if I make it to Heaven is to please not have laundry there! Since I have two grown children (32 and 38) and am starting over again, I truly cannot remember when laundry hasn't been the DEMON in our house.

My just turned 5 year old came home from China at 26 months and loved to clean. He is my bathroom cleaner (no toilets), but wipes ALL the bathrooms down EVERY DAY! It's just habit, but boy does it help a tired MaMa.

Love the new blog design, too.

Michal said...

Listen- Legos can kill. That's the truth. Funny how that's never in their marketing.

I am the same way- slightly OCD and really dependent on order. I have seen my house slipping down a slippery slope for some time. Knowing I have a 2 year old on the way - in addition to the 5 year old? Well, that just makes my spine shiver.
We have semi-unexpected company coming tomorrow and I will spend the ENTIRE day getting this joint into some semblance of order.
I am so glad that I am not alone. BC I had this sparkling clear home. Now it's sort of in between what it used to be and the pictures of your place. I am no fool I know that once we get home from China in Aug (hopefully) my house will look exactly like yours 2 minutes after we walk in the door and it will more than likely stay that way for years.
I am taking this time to "warm" myself up to the idea of a "lived in" home.
Listen, I am not proud. It's just that I am psycho and need clean surfaces before I can relax. Looks like I will be learning some new coping techniques.
It's all good.
Mess = kids.
Kids = full hearts.
Kids+mess+full hearts= My lifelong dream.
I can deal with that math.
Thanks for letting it all hang out. I don't feel so alone in the chaos anymore!

Cate said...

Sigh. My house looks like that minus the toys because I have no children. Just a hectic life and a busy job.

We're getting married in a couple of weeks. I will be calling someone to come clean the house...something I said I'd never do. Well, Girlfriend, never has arrived!

Michelle said...

Amen, sister. :)

S.Wise said...

Ha ha ha. You just made me feel so much better! My house is a WRECK and I only have one peanut!!! :)

Tammy said...

Had to post to let you know I accidentally right clicked (on your pile of laundry lol) & your security thingy popped up just fine.

Holly said...

Oh Christie. I have SO been where you are. So! Big difference? I was BARELY 20years old when I had my first baby! and 23 when I had my second...followed by a hysterectomy and lots of recovery time while my laundry got its freak on behind my back! My kids were very small and I couldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Try that on for inconvenient!! I actually spent days CRYING..no, WEEPING feeling like I was in the toy pit of hell and it would never end. I so relate. I loved my children too. But guess what? I am now 35 years old with a 15 year old and a 12 year old who DO DISHES, LAUNDRY, CLEAN their own bathroom, vacuum the car, sweet the hardwoord floors and wipe windows! Can I get a Yippee Jesus?!
Ah yes, I also have a 4 year old and toddler on the way....funny God, very funny when I was SO close to my quiet little house.
But Christie? The quiet, CLEAN and orderly house? Remember that it isn't all it's cracked up to be. Those toys and dishes and laundry reprensent much desired kiddos. You know that. I know you do! I am convinced that God has given us children so they can teach US way more than we can teach them!
Isn't that just like God?! :)
You are not alone sister....from my messy desk,
Holly

Cora said...

Oh God help me! I am messy BC. I don't know how it happens, I swear. When my husband gets that high paying teachering job :0) I am going to take some time off and get it together, yeah right. I look at our tiny house and I really don't know where the toys are going to go except under my feet, lol.
Thanks for keeping it real! Love reading your posts.

Becky and Naing said...

Oh yes, we all feel this way!! I am not the neatest person in the world, but the toys jumping out all over the house, gets to me. And I am always doing laundry, never stops cuz they always are wearing the cute clothes I got for them. Hoping in the summer when they live in the nude and swimsuits it will slow down. Love to read your blog, your honesty is the BEST! Girl you should write a book!

Anonymous said...

Wow! Thank you, Christie! The only things missing from your living room are the tents(one train,one firetruck) we have set up over here. :) You posed this on the PERFECT day for me to read. I was on the phone with a friend earlier (which is a chore within itself--trying to squeeze that call in) (friend does not have kids..) and the topic of laundry(which "NEEEVER" piles up in her place) came up-- and she acted TOTALLY appalled after I told her how much laundry I had overflowing from a basket in my closet.....(and to think I hadn't even mentioned the two mountainous baskets on top of my dryer and the one going in the washer plus the one in the dryer.. I'm sorry, but she will be in for a rude awakening when she has kids.. She loves to point out how "neat and organinzed" she is... Okay, now I'm the rude and annoying one mentioning this, but I had to share/vent. ~Holly

Marie-Claude said...

I get it, Amen, and thank you...you and I are not alone!

Oh I remember my big old house BC...now let's just say it's getting a little bit better. With a 12 yo with chores to do, her room, diswasher.. (and she likes to do them..for now) that helps a lot. As for the 5 yo..well I was pretty fed up of stepping on legos and playmobil and for her asking me ''Where are my...'' so I realized in kindergarten they do no take out a toy if the other toy they are not playing with is not at it's proper place... My OCD kicked. Went to Ikea, bought those beautiful toy tubs (like drawers) 2 sets, legos got a spot, playmobil, etc. printed their logos, sticked it on each drawer.. and now..:):):) she is so proud of stuff being all at the right place (she is not looking for them also..they are the right place) she is a happy girl. Not to mention the mom :). Ok, I might have developped in her an OCD, but as long as she picks up.. I can manage the rest. The rest...well the rest of the house is AC still, it's getting better as they grow up but I know it will probably never be as organized and cleaned as BC but we had a big, quiet, house and we were yearning to hear and see kids in the house...Yes it's chaos sometimes but I wouldn't trade my chaos.. It's just sometimes a magic wand would be a good thing.

You are not alone,

Marie-Claude :)

Shannon said...

Laundry is my nemesis. I not-so secretly wish for disposable clothing. And cleaning...with children...what's the point? I clean only to discover the kids (or the dogs for that matter) are making a mess again. I've learned to just let it go (and hope no one ever decides to drop by unannounced!).

Kristy said...

You don't have to justify anything to anybody!!!! That is why I just love the heck out of you, you are so honest!!! I love it!!!!

Love and blessings, Kristy

KO said...

Oh so True!

Kim said...

Ok.. I have extreme OCD.. very badly.. and it is bad sometimes..I have to try and say..
Kim sit back and enjoy the little things.. so that is what you are going to have to do too my friend.
you have two beautiful little ones to enjoy. BUT totally get the whole OCD.. and you know.. I really have a hard time and mine are grown..lol...Love you .. love this post.. you always say things that are sooo much like me..hugs.

angie said...

I am laughing out loud! I sit at my computer reading other's blogs, with 2 loads of clean laundry sitting next to me. They are both whites in which the children have had to sort through for the past week to find matching socks. I should put them away...or not. I mean, it is about time to do whites again!

Yes, legos can kill. As can the dogs naga's--slimy and sharp at the same time... I never walk through my house in the dark. That would be like a kamikaze suicide mission. Love my kiddos (off to china to get baby #3 soon)--not lovin' their "stuff" so much.

Anonymous said...

well...reality! we all know it lurks. and we all try to ignore it. but i think at this stage, we are now IN the reality! the way i tame the laundry monster is two-fold, and it works for me. 1) keep everyones clothes separate. wash and dry one persons laundry at a time (i use warm or cold water, most lights and darks together). 2)one day do adults clothes, another day do kids, and another do linens. all the laundry gets done every week. and folding and putting away doesnt include the dreariness of sorting!
i got tired of all the tub toys, and then they would get moldy!! i found that simple cups were entertaining and easy to clean (stacking cups, empty plastic food tubs). im not condemning, its just...been there, done that; would love to make the trip easier for someone else!! i remember a verse i used to send out on baby cards..."settle down cobwebs, dust go to sleep, i'm rocking my baby and babies dont keep!!" blessings,mrs.k.

Shannon said...

I actually think your house looks pretty good!!!! Maybe it is because I am 18 years AK (after kids???). Your standards get a little lower every year! Well, it's not that bad. Keep teaching the little ones to help. I have had to resist the temptation to "fix" their poor cleaning jobs many times. But it is not about a clean house, it is about teaching them to learn to be a productive member of the family. Now that they are teens, they really are starting to make a difference around here! Have fun!

jackie said...

When I had three kids under 5, I used to lay in the bathtub at night and count the months until they were all away at school and I could have a clean house...then I decided to homeschool! HA!!

They really do actually get to the point where they can help you clean up. :)