Tidbits of Titillating Topics

Right. So, today the phone rang and I saw it was the adoption agency for our Ethiopian adventure. I panicked first and answered second. Thoughts running through my head were:
1. Something is wrong with the paperwork
2. They're shutting/slowing down the process
3. We're all of a sudden disqualified.
4. Something is wrong with the paperwork.
5. We're all of a sudden disqualified.

Are you sensing a theme here? Our China process has been seamless. Seamlessly bad! There haven't been any road bumps, as one might think, or any major upheavals - but that's just it. There hasn't been anything! No word, just an ever-increasing wait time. So when you hear from your new (2nd) agency, mid-process - and you've come to associate actually adopting with, say, retirement, you start to imagine what our life has been like for the last two years. I said hello, and she said "just checking in and making sure you're ok, and that you don't need anything". Eh? Are you sure you have the right number? I mean, thank you. I mean...that is to say...errr...we're good. Still paperchasing. Just waiting on Government docs, as per usual (snort giggle). At this point, I'm so giddy to have non-negative communication I pretty much blacked out. So that was that...just checking on us. Uh-huh...wow...and then she even said "well, I'll call you next month and see how your doing!" I know! I feel like I slipped into the Adoption Zone - someone actually cares how we are?!?!

So the BURNING HOT QUESTIONS from the last post are:

1. Do you like AB bald? Yes and no. On the one hand, it's nice to go out and have people think I've brought along my bodyguard. On the other hand, I spent the first two days following "the shave" just walking up to him and saying "you're very bald". It's been an adjustment, but he definitely has his moments of being dead sexy with that bald head o' his. It's just hair - it will grow back.

2. Will he grow it back? How soon? Yes, he will. And as far as how soon - he estimated it would be a couple weeks totally bald and then he'd leave it alone. Let's keep in mind that shaving the head every day for AB is right up there with shaving the legs everyday for us ladies. He's not into the chore of it. And quite frankly, he's cut himself so badly that he's got band aids on his head. It's kind of, (dare I say it?) hilarious to see all these band aids all over and you just feel bad for him, but you're hiding the giggles.

I have to go on Friday for my Hep B series shot. I just physically gulped when I typed that. That in turn made me laugh, because I'm such a wimpy wimp.

I can't wait until these shots are over with! I still have FIVE to go...

nother' gulp...

Speaking of haircuts - it was time for me to do my annual "hack it off" and so I took my little self right up to the SAY-LON (that's southern style!) today and did away with 2 1/2 inches off the bottom. It's layered and lighter, and fun. I always love my hair the day I whack it off! Ahhhhhh....much better!

I've been thinking a lot about mothering. A lot about my style of parenting and wondering what that will look like and how that will change my life. What kind of Mom I will be and what kind of kids I will have. I also have to confess that even in the middle of a second adoption, I feel like neither will ever take place. I don't feel this way all the time, but certainly a lot of the time if I stop and think about it. It just feels like it's surreal. But there is no other option than to keep plugging along. Other than have no children - and that's just not an option, unless the good Lord closes all possible doors. Up to the present, He's only opened them, so we're walking on...but every year we say "next year" or "a year from now" and it's been that way for four years. I'm weary. I feel like some days it's all a sham. All this baby stuff we've collected, and all this preparing - what if it's for nothing. What if, what if, what if!??!? So I try not to go there, and I just try and imagine that all of this will be a distant memory once I have my kids in my arms, where they belong. So, yeah...I'm wondering what that will look like - what kind of mom I will be...and will I ever actually get on a plane bound for Africa or China, out to find and bring home my little darlings?

This is funny. Really it is. The other day, I got totally lost in thought about exercising, and dieting. I thought about attempting for the 1000th time to be a health nut. And then I got exhausted just thinking about it. And I started to crave Pringles. And it just so happened that we had some - Sour Cream and Onion. So, as I made my way through that can, I was thinking of ways to work out more. Errr...work out at all, rather. And then AB called and wanted to know where I wanted to meet for dinner. Sushi, please! And so when I sat down at the table, AB said some magic (unprovoked) stuff that maybe I needed to hear..."you're so beautiful...I love you just the way you are...you make me happy!" So on that note...(ahem)...I'm content again to be "Big Mama". For now anyway...

...and anyway, with the holidays coming - I can't bear the thought of health shakes and protein bars in exchange for my dearly beloved turkey dinner and chocolate dream pie! (*insert drooling here). But I did get EXCELLENT news this month and it came from my lovely Mom an Dad - they will be coming to visit us for the Thanksgiving holiday and I could not be happier about it. I get them all to myself (sans my younger siblings) for a whole week, and it's my Dad's first time to TX. Wha-hoo! I'm so glad their coming, I can hardly stand it!

So that's the latest and greatest - although there is always more to tell! I have post coming soon with a Hospitality Flare! Stay tuned!