So I bet you might be wondering “whatsuh happenin’ hot stuff” with this month’s challenge “30 Days of No Defense”?
Well two things: first of all, there are 31 days in the month, so I’ve decided to defend myself mightily on the 31st for all the things I’ve been avoiding on the first 30. Ahem. (kidding, jeesh!) Second, it’s going as well as my posts have indicated. Which is like saying “blech” or “boo-hiss”. Like that.
When you say you’re going to do this or that or the other? There are usually 1,000,000 reasons why those things fall apart in your hands. So we’ve had a month intended for “No Defense” which has turned into a month of “Defend Yourself”. No really. Like every little thing that could be argued about or disagreed upon? Yes, this is the month in which it has become LIFE ALTERING not to argue about it. We couldn’t put these things on hold, say, until next month. No. Too easy.
So those people sitting on opposite sides of the couch down there?
That sums up October.
And that is to say: be careful what you think you can tame over night. Especially if it’s your tongue. When you say you’re going to change a bad behavior or work on a tough spot – look out, people. You heard it here. Not nearly as easy as I thought it might be. We have struggled much more heavily with this month’s challenge than I ever thought we would. I knew it would be hard, but I didn’t know how discouraged I might get when I saw just how much we rush to our own defenses when things don’t come out how we plan. Clearly this challenge has shown us how much work we truly have to do in this area of communication, gentleness, kindness, and just loving each other better. Yeah. Not so bueno.
The good news is - we see better. Where we need to work. Where we need to change and how. Where we'd like to be. And buddy do we have our work cut out for us. A mountain of it. But the desire and the love and the commitment to make it what it can be - all there. And that's one of the best things that came from this month - just the realization that despite having to address some tough habits, we're in this for the long haul and willing to keep plugging away at that "mountain". Baby steps. Proud of us for trying - even if the results were less than stellar.