I can't believe it...just two days after I thought we were stuck in "Review" for yet another month, we got an amended e-mail from our agency saying that we had, in fact, finished review and hopped over to the glorious "Pending Referral" side of the fence. Hallelujah! I thought we would never get here.
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! and we're so freaking out excited about it, we can hardly stand it. We thought we had missed it again and were so disappointed.
I wondered why I was so excited and felt foolish, and then I realized - we are just waiting for someone to have the time to sit down and match us with our baby girl.
"ok, who is this family? (as she grabs a file from the stack) AB and CB....hmmmm...loud and vivacious Daddy quiet/loud passionate Mommy- .I think this baby is their daughter..." (picture goes on file)
That's it. That's all that's left, and I'm just crying over here trying to swallow that reality. I always felt something would stand in the way, but I should have remembered that we serve a bigger God than that! I know it's just a matter of time now to meet her and hold her and be able to show her how much her parents love her. To be able to put that gorgeous room to use, and to be able to sit with her on the floor of her room and read and play together. And to finally shush the hubby for all the darling clothes I've bought. Because once he sees her in them, it's all downhill Daddy love from there.
I was sitting praying this morning and thanking God for these little victories along the way, because they keep Anton and I grounded firmly in this process. Even knowing that we have several more months to go - it's still such a milestone for us. So many times we wanted to jump ship, and wondered why God would lead us down this painful road - but we never doubted that Keira was our daughter. And I think God has truly given us the strength by way of amazing friends (hint,hint M3) who have been an invaluable support system, peace and confirmation at every stage of this process, and a constant growing love for our little daughter who has never seen our faces, but yet who we have a God given amazing depth of love for - sight unseen. Only God can do that...
Anyway, I just wanted you all to know that I really appreciate sweet Erin giving us the "shout out" - it totally touched my heart. Within an hour of us finding out that we made it through Review, I got an e-mail from Erin to the M3 Posse saying "Christie and Anton are FINALLY out of the Review Room!!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!".
I love you girls...you're the best! And Kelli...my God girl...if it had not been for you...(sob)....
Love and hugs,